Thursday 12 February 2009

A Needle In A Haystack....


If I haven't mentioned it yet, this OutCan screening really is a pain in the ass (or in the arm, as the case may be). As part of our screening, we needed a copy of all of our immunization records. You'd think we were moving to or from the Congo for God's sake, but never mind. Better safe than sorry, I suppose. The kids were easy enough, they each received an Immunization booklet when they were born. And Dan has a special needle book, his is an International Certificates of Vaccination (I do not have needle book envy, honest). The army takes vaccinations very seriously, which makes sense given soldiers are sent all over the world on operations and they need to be well protected. Since Dan joined the army, he has had more vaccinations than the rest of us combined! Have I mentioned he absolutely HATES needles? Poor baby! Typhoid, yellow fever (I'd never even heard of that one!), TB..... you name it, he's had it. Except for Japaneses Encephalitis.. he hasn't had that shot yet, but I'm sure it's in his future, as there is a page for it in his needle book. So, as you may have guessed, I'm the only one without an Immunization booklet. No needle book= no record of my childhood immunizations (this might account for the needle book envy I don't have, really, I don't). Urgh!! I spent the better part of a week trying to track down a record of my childhood immunizations. You can guess how much fun that was. I'm sure it was much like trying to find the proverbial needle in the haystack. I thought the best place to start would be with my medical records, surely my immunization record would be in my chart. How foolishly naive I was! Trying to track down my medical records has got to be one of the most frustrating endeavours I have under taken. I'm not kidding you. It's a problem common with a lot of military families, we're constantly moving from province to province, doctor to doctor (if we're lucky enough to even find a doctor that is). Sometimes our chart makes the journey with us, sometimes not. Unfortunately for me, mine hasn't made it back to Petawawa yet. After 4 days, I did finally manage to track my chart down, only to discover, when your chart gets sent on to a new doctor, only part of the chart moves with you, so the likelihood my childhood records are in that chart are slim to none. Too bad somebody couldn't have told me that on day 1 of my quest! After all, it's not like I don't have anything better to do with my time, like say, fill out more screening forms. Some of the offices were most helpful, others not so much. On day 4, I made another trip to my doctor's office. Of course, I'd already been there 2 times before, but third times a charm. I finally talked to a nurse who has worked for Public Health, and she felt my best bet would be to call our local Public Health Office. What a brilliant idea, too bad none of the 20 other people I talked to along the way had thought of that. So, after I had wasted 4 days searching for the illusive charts, I had my answer in 20 minutes. I kid you not, 20 minutes! The mind really does boggle sometimes! If I absolutely had to have a copy of my Immunization record, the best people to talk to would be Public Health in Nova Scotia. However (there's always got to be that caveat, doesn't there?), Public Health Nova Scotia is notoriously a pain in the ass for getting records from, as in it can take many phone calls and up to 6 months to get any information from them. Ontario hates to deal with them. I'm still not sure if this might not be another example of the classic Upper Canadian attitude that everything in the Maritimes is backwards or not, but I didn't have time to wait and find out. So, after all that run around, what it all boiled down too was have a blood test done to see what immunizations I have (which could take a couple of weeks and not always reliable anyway), or have them all done over again. Having them down all over again was definitely the quickest option (and the most painful as well), but it had to be done. And as it turned out, I needed boosters for all my vaccinations anyway, (too bad nobody bothered to tell me that 4 days ago!) as I had my last vaccination when I was 15. My bad. So, off I went to the weekly Vaccination Clinic that they hold at the Military Resource Centre on Base. Just me and all the infants getting our shots. Luckily, I only had to get 5 boosters, in 2 needles. And I didn't even cry! Not one tear, aren't you proud of me? The nurse was really nice but you know, she never even asked me if I wanted a sticker, let alone a sucker! I was really looking forward to that sucker too. I might have to complain about that when I go back for my Hep A&B shot. It's just not fair! Hmmph! She did put 2 really pretty circle band aids on my arm. The needles themselves didn't hurt, but my arm sure as hell hurts tonight. Not that I'm getting any sympathy from Dan mind you, it's just not his way. The kids, on the other hand, were most concerned about my arm when they got home from school. That probably has something to do with the fact that there's some Hep A shots in their future, and they might be looking for a little sympathy of their own. Poor Connor even gets to have a Meningitis shot. I don't think he was amused when I told him it was a bonus for turning 13!! I wonder if he'll forgive me if I give him a sucker when he gets home? Probably not! Oh well! But wait, I almost forgot to mention the best part of my day... I finally got an Immunization Booklet of my very own! Just, what I have always wanted! I know, it's not special like Dan's (how could it be), but it's a lot prettier. It's a lovely antique mustard colour, and do you want to know what's best of all? Mine has it's very own protective plastic case! Imagine it! That's right, that's what I'm talking about! Who has needle book envy now baby?



“I am a world-class weenie when it comes to letting people stick needles into me. My subconscious mind firmly believes that if God had wanted us to have direct access to our bloodstreams, He would have equipped our skin with small, clearly marked doors.”~Dave Barry

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