Let me just say that I am not a pet person. It's not that I dislike pets, its just I dislike the work that comes with them. The kids have been after a dog for years, but as they are inherently lazy, I knew it would be me doing the bulk of the work. With Dan being gone for most of the last year, and now for the next 7 months, they all knew not to even go there. And then Connor had to ask for a friggin hamster for Christmas. A hamster of all things, a bloody rodent. I'm not overly found of rodents, who is really?? My dislike of them probably stems from the family of rats that made residence in our garage in Gagetown, and the squirrels there were basically glorified rats! But someone (who shall remain nameless, but he knows who he is) overrode me on this one. Because really, that's just what I need when Dans gone and I'm alone with the kids, is a pet rat.It was bound to happen, really it was only a matter of time. So, as if my life is not exciting enough (well actually, it's not exciting at all, but never mind), today it started off with a panic of epic proportions. Connor went down stairs to get dressed only to come running back up again, wailing at the top of his lungs. He was so distressed, I actually thought he was injured, or the house was on fire. Luckily, it was neither. I calmed him down long enough for him to sob, "Pine Cone is out of his nest, what are we going to do, what are we going to do??" At this announcement, the girls both started to wail as well, and Katty immediately jumped on the couch, and started to shake like a leaf (this is the child who has always been leery of animals, especially squirrels). There was so much wailing going on, for a minute I thought I was at the wailing wall! And of course, someone started crying I want daddy, and then of course the "if daddy was here he'd know what to do started." And the whole time I'm standing there thinking, its a frigging hamster, its not a boa constrictor, its an itty bitty hamster. I mean, I know its basically a glorified rat, but geeze, its not of the savage attack breed. As I'm thinking this, Connor immediately calmed down, and then began to instruct me as to how "we" were going to handle the situation. So while I got his sisters ready for the bus, off he went to get Pine Cone some apples (and funny unlike his Nana, he actually managed to use the apple wedger right side up.) He then proceeded to place the apples and other food in a trail to Pine Cone's exercise ball, he emptied the book shelf so I could left it up, and 20 minutes later, Pine Cone was safely in his nest, with the lid taped on. Poor little thing, after his all too brief taste of freedom, took a long swig of water before settling in to recuperate from his adventure. And the worst to come of it all (besides my humming "Born Free" all day), was that Connor missed the bus, and I had to drive him to school. Which actually wasn't too bad after all, as I had to drive right by Tim Horton's to take him to school.
"Free at last, free at last. Thank God Almighty, we are free at last."~~Martin Luther King Jr
8 comments:
I think Connor handled himself admirably. It seems to me that the next logical step is getting a dog.
Um, yeah, NO!!!
Well done, Connor! That was some good thinking!
Food leading to exercise ball, sounds like a trap to me! Poor little puff ball, he must have been tired out(and Pinecone must have been too)!
Annette
Now, Monica; not against pets, huh? Aren't you the same girl who called my beautiful Cinders, "a viciois animal"?
Mon - here's the "pet progression" as it played out at my house with "Elly May"...
-numerous fish (names forgotten)
-a hamster (Ginger) who we surmise committed hari kari by handing with a discarded piece of dental floss
-Daisy - God love her - rescued from the Springhill shelter - had the finest black hair ever to gather in a ball and roll around the hardwood floors
-Sassy - good riddance - a NS barn cat with attitude from start to finish - now resting in the back 40 at Pat's work
-Nick - the Guinea Pig that died in the neighbour's care when we were at the cottage. was handed back to us frozen in a shoe box? Had a wake - 40 people attended. Eulogy below...
_____________________________________
This is not a solemn occasion but rather a time for celebration. Why? Because Nick
WAS SOME PIG!
We are not here today to question why Nick's light went out so soon, but to remember how bright it shone during his short but full pig life. Writing this eulogy was easier than I expected because Nick was so straightforward. He knew exactly who he was and what was important to him. In particular, I will never forget his smell – a delightful blend of rotting wood chips and pig piss.
Family always came first for Nick, right after scratching and licking himself. He was extremely close to his parents, brother, sister and their families. We would visit them often at PetSmart, where every weekend consisted of long talks, eating a weeks worth of newspaper (he liked the Sun girl page the best – the Free Press gave him gas), and knocking down the water bottle until dehydration had them all at death’s door. Our cat, Sassy, was the love of his life (as she is with all of us) and when he knew she was nearby and hungry, he treated her like a little princess.
We spent an incredible amount of time together and were generally happy ordering pizza, drinking beer and watching Seinfeld reruns. But Nick loved to see the world and we never missed a chance to show him more of it. When he wasn’t at home, he traveled to the garage, the bathroom sink, and under the car, where he had to be broomed out and re-captured. One thing is certain - he lived his life to the fullest and never expressed any regrets.
It was easy to spot Nick at a party - he was the guy with the inch long toenails and balding ass.
Nick had a knack for seeing beauty in every day situations. He loved to hang out in his 2 by 4 foot world, and just enjoy the simple pig pleasures of life like spilling his food over and over, dreaming of a hot date with Miss Piggy, and dining on his own poop.
So don’t feel bad for Nick – he lived life to its fullest, got fat, went quick, and was quick frozen (before Walt Disney had the idea I might add).
His bright light will shine forever, and Nick's legacy will never, ever disappear. That’s because, when the conditions are just right, the corner of our basement still smells like rotting wood chips and pig piss.
Now that Nick has gone to that great landfill in the sky, let’s all raise a glass and drink a toast to Nick – HE WAS SOME PIG!
____________________________________
So Mon - just wanted you to see how one pet leads to....many others. Good luck.
Gerry
Ok, first of all Mom ,that cat was just evil, he made Katty's headspinning seem down right angelic.
Gerry, you just made me spit diet coke on the key board. Too freakin funny. More pets, God help me, I was wishing one of the heavier refrence books might take a tumble out of the pile, but no such luck. Poor Pine Cone, he's almost a good rat. In fact, I can hear him in there plotting his next escape as he spins mindlessly on his wheel.
Post a Comment